Grades
School ended last week. I'm not certain about my grades.
I'm looking to transfer this year. I think my odds are good. At least I'll e going somewhere and not stuck in the same place for another year. I don't care where I end up. I just want to finish my degree. I just want to have a place of my own. And then what?
Training
In February I'm doing this thing called Tough Mudder. It's an endurance obstacle course: 10-12 miles and twenty-something obstacles. Team work is big. You're supposed to help anyone you can along the route. It should be fun.
Before November, I wasn't able to swim. But when I heard that there would be obstacles that required swimming, I decided now was the best time.
I started taking swim classes at a YMCA. There's this cute lifeguard there, but I don't really have any opportunities to talk with her. Plus, I don't even know how old she is. For all I know she can be 25 or 17. I should ask her next time.
I've also joined a gym. I'm now swimming 2-3 times a week. I was so proud of myself this morning when I went swimming. This morning was the first time I was able to swim freestyle and breath at the same time. My speed is nothing to rave about and my strokes/breathing are pretty sloppy, but I'm just happy I was finally able to do it. Pluuus, swimming is a great workout.
Girlfriend
Still no girlfriend.
I have a phobia, I think, of revealing or sharing with other people in real-life. I'm afraid of being vulnerable. I'm afraid of dropping my guard and giving myself to another person. I need to find the confidence that I know I have within me before I start dating anyone. I have this problem with friendships, too. None of my real-life friendships are too personal. I get uncomfortable if there isn't a certain mental distance. Does that make any sense?
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ReplyDeleteWork:
ReplyDeleteI got a job at the deli department of a grocery store. Yay me. My coworkers call me "Little One" or "Young One." Still half-heartedly looking for a "real" job.
Boyfriend:
Still no boyfriend. There's a cute guy at work, but he's only 20. Kinda young.
Training:
No physical training except standing up for 8 hours a day and smiling at everyone and being nice, even when they're rude.
Friends:
I have one friend around here, and she's always busy.
Dude, I'm afraid of being vulnerable in real life too. It kinda sucks, because it's hard for people to get to know me if I never tell them anything.
Those are cute nicknames. Yup, it does suck being afraid of opening yourself to people. I want be with someone who really, actually, likes me. And they understand that it's not that I don't want to share, but that I'm a private person who is afraid of being criticized.
DeleteMerry Christmas, Anonymously Me. Thank you for still reading my blog.
I will always read your blog as long as you keep writing.
DeleteI'm thinking of starting my blog back up again, but we'll see.