Quietly, Late At Night

I thought about some random person from high school today. You know how sometimes you're thinking about one thing, and then you remember events, people, and places connected to that one thing; and five or six different connections later you're thinking about a totally different subject? Yeah, that's why I was thinking about this random person.

Anyway, I was thinking about her today (she was the friend of a friend) and I imagined what I would say if I saw her one of these days. For instance, if I saw her tomorrow by coincidence, I supposed we'd talk about how long it's been since we've seen each other, pretending to care and all that (hah, I'm mean sometimes); eventually, we'd get around to talking about what we've been up to. I'd say, "I'm pretty much the same person from high school - except 30 pounds heavier." She'd say, "Surely you're different in some ways." And I'd say, "Nope. I'm exactly the same." "But you've probably had girlfriends or something though, right? You don't mean to tell me - " And I'd interrupt her and say, staring straight into her eyes: "Exactly. The same." And I'd walk away.

haha, that's silly.

Hmm. I don't think I am the same person from high school. That's probably what you were thinking. "He's the same since high school? What?" It's just something I thought about.

Then I thought, "Man" - because I say Man quite often - "Man, I'm probably going to have to wait till grad school to find a girlfriend." (Because, somewhere in my mind, I think a lot of single people find partners in grad school.) Then I thought, "What makes you so sure you'll find a girlfriend in grad school?" I thought, "What if I never find anyone because I'm so socially clumsy and clueless about other people?" And then my entire lonely life ran sadly through my mind. That's when I stopped thinking about that subject.

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Saw a short Mexican lady (well, no surprise there) with her family buying tacos from a truck near the corner of Normandy and Adams. Her husband, daughter, and young son were with her. I looked at her and her husband creepily, as we waited for the tacos. She had on a white t-shirt, with frilly sleeves, and orange capris. From her face, I'd say she was in her early 30s. I noticed her face because her skin was very clear and smooth, which for some reason stuck out to me. She also had wavy brown hair, which was pinned together with a big hair clip that had black and white flowers on it. Her hair looked very soft and clean, which also stuck out to me. I wasn't judging her or anything. I only thought, noticing these details about her, "She's a pretty person," even if she wasn't exactly gorgeous or anything. All things considered, she looked like a regular person. But I still thought she looked nice. There's more than one way to be beautiful. You probably already know that.

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Scenes From My Life:

I remember taking class photos in 12th grade, 8th grade, and 5th grade. In 5th grade, I remember tying my jacket around my waist, the way young kids still do. That used to be the coolest thing a kid could do.

I remember my first day of kindergarten. I cried. I remember watching my mother leave with another mom, and a sudden loss of my senses as I pressed my face against the windows and cried, "NO! MOMMY, NO! COME BAAAACCCKK!!!" Meanwhile, the rest of the class was sitting down on the floor listening to the teacher read or something. "Stop crying, and come sit down," I think my teacher finally said. I stopped crying and slowly moved to sit down with the other kids. Some kid next me looked at me like I could start again any second. That was a good start to the year.

I remember going to my friends house on a day off from school, at like noon or something, because our other friend was black-out drunk on his lawn. We were fifteen, I think.

I remember in sixth grade science sitting at a desk way in the corner. The desks were so close together, I had to trip my way out of my corner when the bell rang. We violated about a dozen fire codes in that classroom that year.

Ah, I remember some of the times I got a Student of the Month certificate in elementary school. Every class had one or two or three, and each month the entire school had an assembly in the cafeteria. They were given for good grades, or for working hard, or for being really nice to that kid that one time at recess. You got your picture taken with the principal, and your parents were even invited to attend. See, I wasn't always such a bad student. I can achieve top honors if I apply myself. Even Student of the Month.

I remember a rainy day in elementary school. Because recess was held outside, we weren't allowed to play on rainy days. Instead, the entire school sat in the cafeteria on hard, quick-fold benches, and watched Wallace & Gromit movies. We did that for lunch, too, since our second recess was included in our lunch time.

I remember our elementary school colors were green. On Fridays, if you wore green, you'd get a Jolly Rancher from the principal and vice-principal as they went around to every class. I owned a school t-shirt and a school sweater.

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Sometimes I feel like I post too much. Like, I'm over saturating your interest.

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One of my favorite songs at the moment:

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Next post, I'll try to remember more things from my recent childhood. I'll have more imaginary conversations with people I hardly knew. And, I'll discuss my impending school orientation (Thursday!), along with the anxiety and fears that come with it.

Goodnight.