Math Isn't For Everyone

Well, shoot. I'm back where I was at the end of May. I'm facing the risk of failing my math class. Tomorrow's the final, and if I don't do well--meaning roughly an A--I'll probably fail the class. Once that happens, all bets are off on my future. I honestly don't know what will happen. In a way I'm petrified. Today I felt nauseous and my thinking was incomprehensible from the stress.

But for another reason, I'm glad. I've been feeling very stagnant lately, and I think if I do fail the class--75% chance I will--I'll take my work more seriously.

It feels like this upcoming school year will be a good one. I've got all kinds of wonderful things on my horizon in the next few years, opening vistas to a marvelous future--including getting my bachelor's and simply growing up. It seems strange to talk about my future, as if I were evaluating my life on New Years, but why should we only evaluate our future on January 1? I think we should be able to any time. Heck, we're already past the halfway mark in 2010. Can you believe it? So much is the same, yet so much has changed, and so much will change. I'm more mature. I'm no longer that kid I was fresh out of high school; I'm now that kid one year out of high school. Haha.

Anyways, sorry for that small tangent. Returning to my original thought, I just want to say I'm feeling happy again despite my lack of success in mathematics.

Oh, by the way, in case you haven' t noticed, I can't stand being under stress, which is largely why I avoid it--I'm a go-with-the-flow kind of guy. When I'm too worried, I get saaaaaaad....